Be the Person You Have Always Wanted to Be.

The last article I posted was about stopping smoking, and it emphasised a positive self-image. Sometimes I use little stories to illustrate the points I want to get across. Often they are about a surreal guru based in Aberdeen called Paramahansa Banana Dev. Here is a story to illustrate how you can elevate your daily life to create meaning and motivation:

One day a man was walking along by a river. He had been arguing with his wife and had been verbally abusive. He was unhappy. As he walked along he saw a young boy fall into the water. He dived in and pulled the boy to safety, after which he became a hero. The following day he had been abusive and arguing with his wife again, and again he felt unhappy, only this time no one fell into the water as he walked along the riverbank. Instead he met Paramahansa Banana Dev.

‘Banana Dev,’ he said ‘Yesterday I abused and argued with my wife, and I saved a boy and became a hero. Today I have argued with my wife again, and I am not a hero, what must I do?’

‘Well,’ said Banana Dev, ‘you could always employ a boy to jump into the river on a daily basis, so that you could save him. That might make you feel good; but if you want my advice you could make up with your wife, control your temper, and be a hero all day, instead of for half an hour at a time.’

Who are you? Are you a hero or a villain in your own eyes and how do you get to be the person you want to be? With smoking you can be a hero in you own eyes every time you resist the urge to pick up a cigarette.

In order to make positive changes you need to know your values, how you want to feel, to look, to act, and how you want to interact with others. You also need to be consistent and to keep trying. According to Winston Churchill one way forward is to ‘Never, never, never give up.’ Does that work for smoking? Obviously not, but if you never give up in your efforts to be a permanent non-smoker, you will succeed in your aim.

The first step to becoming the person you want to be is to know who that person is. This is a little like goal setting, if you don’t know where you want to go you won’t know where you will end up. The first step is asking the question ‘who do I want to be.’ When you can answer that question and be clear about your beliefs and values you can move forward to achieve your real desires. With each small effort you can move forward and live a life that is truly heroic, and in that way achieve your dreams. If you want to explore some of these issues with one to one assistance, then get in touch with me on 0131 556 5685. Jim Masson Crooks.